Author Tamara Dawn Posted on May 16, 2022May 16, 2022Categories advice, anticipation, grief, hopeless, introspection, isolation, journal, Monday's musing, reflection, thought process, transparency, UncategorizedTags , , ,

I can’t remember what it was like…

Pain really has this way of making you forget what it was like to exist without the pain…. Especially after you have endured the pain for an extended period of time… And lately I have found myself really reflecting on the last 7 years of my life… And I have also found myself really trying to get past feeling like the same ol same ol will remain the same ol same ol… Cause I’m over it… And it honestly doesn’t … Continue reading “I can’t remember what it was like…”

Author Tamara Dawn Posted on March 28, 2022March 22, 2022Categories grief, introspection, journal, Monday's musing, reflection, thought process, transition, transparency, Uncategorized, vulnerabilityTags , , ,

Grief journal: March 2022…

Grief really has taken me on on such a wild journey the last several years… And as the years go by I am finding myself more and more irritated that this is not something that I can just overcome… And I also hate the fact that I will oftentimes get triggered by something unexpected… while not having the reaction that I expected to have when a milestone approaches… And somewhere along the way I heard it said that death was … Continue reading “Grief journal: March 2022…”

Author Tamara Dawn Posted on February 21, 2022February 21, 2022Categories conflict, grief, growth mindset, hopeful, hopeless, introspection, journal, Monday's musing, reflection, thought process, transition, transparency, Uncategorized, vulnerabilityTags , , ,

Hopefully I remember…

During the past several days I have learned how important it is for me to pour out all the mess that tends to float around in my heart and mind… And honestly you would think that I would know that as an external processor, but so often I forget that I can’t stuff the things that are truly bothering me… And there is something so refreshing and freeing about saying, yelling, or screaming out the things that are bothering me … Continue reading “Hopefully I remember…”

Author Tamara Dawn Posted on February 16, 2022February 16, 2022Categories grief, introspection, journal, reflection, thought process, transparency, Uncategorized, vulnerabilityTags , , ,

I wish this had been written on time…

This blogpost is later than it was supposed to be this week… and as I sit here struggling to write about something other than what’s consuming my heart and mind… I really wish it had been on time… Death will never be something that I can fully grasp… and I’d be lying if I said that I ever really take comfort in someone saying that the person who died is “in a better place”… Because while they are off living … Continue reading “I wish this had been written on time…”

Author Tamara Dawn Posted on December 27, 2021December 27, 2021Categories advice, anticipation, decisions, fresh start, grief, growth mindset, hopeful, introspection, isolation, journal, Monday's musing, reflection, relationships, thought process, transition, transparency, Uncategorized, vulnerability, waitingTags , , , ,

There’s beauty found in starting over…

So once again I have “restarted” my workout journey… And though I guess technically it hasn’t been a month since my last workout, whenever I take a longer than expected break from working out, my body feels like it is experiencing the first workout… Starting over is never fun, but I have been thinking a lot about the beauty that can be found in having to start over… And I have also grown to appreciate the fact that I always … Continue reading “There’s beauty found in starting over…”

Author Tamara Dawn Posted on July 5, 2021July 5, 2021Categories grief, journal, Monday's musing, reflection, support, thought process, transparency, Uncategorized, vulnerabilityTags , , , ,

An interesting observation…

Grief is such a wild thing… and though life must continue to move forward… it seems like the hurt grows deeper with every year that passes… Today is the two-year anniversary of the day my uncle passed away… And June 29th was the six-year anniversary of the day my daughters’ father was killed… So for the past five years, my June 27th birthday has been this bittersweet day where my mind and emotions fluctuate between celebrating my life and bracing … Continue reading “An interesting observation…”

Author Tamara Dawn Posted on March 15, 2021April 17, 2021Categories grief, journal, reflection, transparency, Uncategorized, vulnerabilityTags , , ,

Grief journal… avoidance

On my podcast I often say, “I can only give yall what I got…” That’s the way that I record my content… but more so it’s the way that I’ve always lived my life… unapologetically me because I really can only give the world what I have to offer… no more… no less… But right now that mantra feels like a double-edged sword as I’ve been sitting here for a while, allowing myself to be distracted, so that I don’t … Continue reading “Grief journal… avoidance”