I think there is such a misconception about what forgiveness is…
There has to be because I can’t fathom any other reason why someone would willingly choose to NOT forgive someone…
I also think a lot of people believe that forgiving someone means that you have to reconcile with that person and let them back in your life…
It doesn’t…
Or perhaps some people think that forgiving someone means that you have to pretend the offense didn’t occur…
It doesn’t mean that…
And it also doesn’t mean that you are okay with what they did or the way that they offended you…
It doesn’t mean any of those things because forgiveness is not even for the other person…
Like you literally can forgive someone for something while simultaneously keeping your distance from them…
Because at the end of the day forgiving someone is you choosing to let go of what you believe that person owes you…
Now think about that for a second…
When someone offends you, do you feel like they owe you something (even if it’s just an apology)?
Unforgiveness is that feeling that you get as a result of that person not paying you what you feel they owe you…
And sometimes that choices that we make, the way that we live our lives, or even our identities are altered when we walk around with this hatred and bitterness in our hearts…
But freedom comes when we cancel the debt…
Freedom comes when we decide that we will not allow that offense to determine how we act or view ourselves…
Freedom comes when we choose to let all of that go… for us… not for the person who offended us…
We don’t have to let them back in…
We just have to heal so that we can be whole…